Saturday, December 26, 2015

Freudian Slip

Precocious Daughter spent Christmas night with her dad, my Almost-Ex. The plan was for me to pick her up this morning.

But when I got to his place, they informed me that they had changed the plan; they were going to go to Panera Bread for brunch, then drop PDaughter at my apartment. Of course, since I was already there, I invited myself to go to Panera with them, then bring our kiddo back home. We eat together as a family every couple of weeks. Because I for one refuse to have an acrimonious breakup and never see him again. Even though I don't want to be married to him, that doesn't mean I don't love him.

It's weird, but it's what it is.
Anyway, we got to the restaurant and began to place our order. At one point the guy at the register asked me if I wanted to add a 99-cent pastry to my order. And my Almost-Ex chimed in, "No, she's just getting a bagel. I'm getting a divorce...I mean, dessert."

I lost it. We all lost it. The guy at the register probably thought we were out of our minds, which wasn't wrong by any means.

Best. Freudian. Slip. Ever.

You guys are seriously making me look bad. *sigh*

So we went on to have a nice brunch, because despite everything we can still laugh together.

Despite the fact that he has called me a bad mother and a terrible wife.

Despite the fact that he promised I could keep the escrow refund from the sale of the house, yet when it arrived (at his place) this week, that promise miraculously became half the escrow refund (to the tune of $1,500 in his pocket and out of mine).

Despite all these things.

Because it's worth it to me to be shut of him. Free from him. Completely done with him. Really.

Am I being played? Probably. What should I be doing differently? Your call, Drunkards.

Let me know.


  1. As much as you want to keep everything civil, it doesn't sound like it is 100% reciprocal. Cut his losses (because you are damned awesome and he's being a shit) and focus on starting anew. Make it about you now, because he obviously is not caring one bit about your feelings in all of this. Move forward, move on, and keep chugging forward.

    Love ya, doll...

  2. I probably wouldn't be as chummy with him, because it encourages him to keep right on doing what he's doing. Why shouldn't he, if it doesn't bother you? Do you let him know that it bothers you? Did you ask him where the other half of YOUR money is? Do you think PD wanted to go to brunch with him, or do you think that she would just as well have gone back with you? i.e. did *they* change plans, or did *he* change plans, knowing that you'd come along? And did you go dutch, did he pay for PD or did you? So many questions.... But I have never been divorced. So what do I know? You can only do the best you can do at any given moment. Just keep your eyes open. {{{{{CHUCK}}}}}

  3. It's good to get along for the sake of PD. Lawyers could sort out issues like the escrow for you, but that also would cost you...

  4. It's good to get along for the sake of PD. Lawyers could sort out issues like the escrow for you, but that also would cost you...

  5. The family that laughs together may not stay together but at least you can live amicably which is why it pains me to say that you're being played. But there's nothing you could do differently or better.
    You're not the one under any obligation to change. He is.
    I'm sorry he doesn't recognize that.

  6. What you should be doing is keying relations in the formal level and only on the formal level. The "joke" in the restaurant would probably seem much funnier to you than to anyone on the outside - personally, I didn't find it funny at all - which means that the situation in the wreckage of the marriage is so fraught with tension that you're looking for a safety valve to blow off steam in laughter. If your AlmEx is actually going back on his promises, no wonder. And his slip shows that in his mind it's *he* who's being divorced, not you.

    1. *keeping. Blogspot needs an edit option.

    2. I can't believe that it is almost 2016 and blogspot still doesn't have a way to edit comments!


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