Wednesday, April 2, 2014

More Random, But for a Reason

Aaaaaah, I hate this stuff.

But apparently this month if you're a blogger you're supposed to, like, post every day and about certain things and blah blah blah fuck blah.

But I'm a misfit. A miiiiiissfiiiiit.

But my blogpal Rachel over at A Perfectly Single Mom says it is so. And she kicks mammoth ass. So I'm going to, uh, emulate her for one day.

Apparently today is "Post 20 Random Things About Yourself Even Though Your Entire Blog Consists of Random Things About You" day. And I'm totally going to rip off her 20 random facts to create my own. I owe her so much.

I love you, (wo)man.
Here's Rachel's original post so you can see what I've ripped off.

20 Random Things Because Why Not

1. I was born in Milwaukee, WI.

2. My mother was 24 and my father was 23.

3. I have given birth once and been pregnant three times. (two miscarriages)

4. Growing up, I totally wanted to be a paleontologist. Then I became artsy and also had zero aptitude for math or science. Yet I've spent most of my career working with sciency people, go figure.

5. My sister is amazing. We spent a lot of years doing our own things, but now she lives a five-minute walk from my house, and I love it.

6. When I was 14 I moved to Plano, Texas. It scarred me. I hate that place. For reals.

7. My brother served in the Navy on a nuclear submarine. He's awesome.

8. I have one brother and one sister. I love them both dearly, although I don't think we're nearly as close as many adult siblings are. That's probably a result of how we were brought up.

9. I was 30 when I got pregnant for the first time. My mom had her third and final child (me) when she was just 24. I would have been a shitty mother at 24.

10. My first job was at Baskin-Robbins. I've written about it before.

11. I suffered bouts of major depression every five years from ages 12 to 33. I finally started taking Prozac, and the depression cycle ended. Now I just drink to excess.

12. I have no tattoos. I think I might want one, but I can't decide what. I've written about that, too.

13. I've been married once and am on the road to divorce. I loved my spouse with all my heart and soul. I love him still. But it takes more than love to make a marriage, and that is the most difficult lesson I've ever had to learn.

14. My feet are hideous. They used to be so cute. But they haven't aged well. I blame stuffing my feet into high heels every day for the last dozen years.

15. I will never depend on a man for my happiness. Even though I have a man who makes me happy beyond compare, I refuse to need him to make me happy. And he understands that, which is one of the reasons I love him so much.

16. I love roller coasters. But I HATE standing in line. And crowds. So I don't know when I'll ride one again.

17. I am a procrastinator who is trying very hard to reform. I paid off my beloved Beetle five years ago but never got the title. And now that it possibly might be totaled by my insurance company, I have to figure out who has my title and how to get it. Ugh.

18. Listing 20 random facts about yourself is pretty easy when you just rip off someone else's list. Thanks, Rachel!

19. I grew up the smart kid. School was easy. All my parents wanted to see were good grades, but they never taught me to think about what I might actually accomplish with my brains and talent. So I  never worked very hard at anything and lived a pretty mediocre life. As a result, I'm raising Precocious Daughter to believe that she can accomplish anything as long as she works for it, and good grades are nice too but not a substitute for actually pursuing her dreams.

20. Rachel ended her list by asking her readers to share five random things about themselves. But I don't really care if you do that for me or not. I'd love it if you did. But if you don't, 'sokay. You've got things to do. You should do them.

And that is my post for tonight. You rock, Rachel. And you, my Drunkards, you rock, too.

Oh, and because I haven't mentioned it here in a couple of days...

Ted Nugent is a huge douchebag whose mouth is way bigger than his ballsack and also he hates freedom. #TedNugentBeatdown.

Thank you.


  1. Why kick mammoth ass? What did the mammoth do to her?

    I'd prefer kicking mastodon ass.

    I'm leaving for work now, but I may or may not come by and post some stuff about me here later. I mean, I do this random facts about me thing on Google Plus once every couple of months or so.

  2. 1) I come from a huge family. Mom and stepdad, 2 half brothers. Dad and various stepmoms, 1 sister, 4 brothers. Adoptovd parents, 5 sisters, 9 brothers. Yeah. Big ol' family.

    2) I regret never pursuing a language other than English. I dream of being fluent in French, German, and ASL.

    3) I love my hubby, but sometimes I don't like him. That is tough to write.

    4) I like my job because it's a challenge and I love my coworkers, but sometimes I feel retarded next to them. They are so insanely smart.

    5) I'm a tomboy still, but I have my fangirl moments. Totally not ashamed of it, either.

    Bonus- this is the only blog besides PostSecret that I read regularly.

  3. Because you're amazing I'm going to rip off five of my random facts from your 20.

    1. As a kid I wanted to be a marine biologist. I was always artsy, though, and sucked at math, and while primary school biology was a breeze I couldn't hack the math in college level biology. That's probably just as well because I went to a small Indiana university where the science department was run by Creationists. The head of the religion department and most of the faculty there were cool with evolution. No joke.

    2. I was born in Nashville, Tennessee, and still live here, which is funny because most people here come from somewhere else.

    3. I want a tattoo of a Lycosa rabidosa.

    4. My first job was working for a temp agency, so my first job was a lot of jobs.

    5. I used to procrastinate but now I keep putting it off.

    1. You want a tattoo of a poisonous spider? That's simultaneously creepy and a little badass. Wouldn't you constantly be waking up and scaring the hell out of yourself when you saw your tattoo?

    2. I'm SO glad you put that, because I was going to Google it. As an arachnaphobe, bad idea.

    3. The wolf spider's bite is like a sweat bee's sting: it might hurt, but it ain't gonna do any damage. That makes it a lot less badass. And I'd like to get it on the back of my shoulder, so I'd never see it except maybe in a mirror. On those rare occasions when I have my shirt off, though, I think it'd be funny if someone mistook it for a real spider.

      And they're one of those spiders that doesn't build webs. It has to chase down its prey. Some people can sit in their webs and take whatever flies in. Some of us have to go out and grab what we want.

  4. Ted Nugent IS a huge douchebag.

    I love this. I love reading shit about people. I'm a voyeur. So, there's one.
    I grew up playing in a run down cemetery.
    Part of my childhood included my parents becoming holy rollers and speaking in tongues. (I should write about that).
    I never had fast food even once until I was around 16 years old.
    The highlight of my childhood was getting to dance on stage with the Banana Splits.

  5. Dammit...that above comment was from me. I forgot to comment as ME instead of my google account. BB tongue doesn't mean anything nasty. It's just me making fun of my sister.

  6. Well, twenty random facts about me that you don't know. I think you'll probably like me less after reading them, but then I'm being honest.

    1. I’m a singleton – no brothers or sisters, thank goodness. I have a hard enough time tolerating distant relatives, let alone siblings.
    2. I have wanted to be, over the years, a pilot, a marine biologist, and a submariner. I ended up as a dentist, something I definitely had no plans on being.
    3. I am a dog person. Dad to a German Shepherd and two Neapolitan Mastiffs at the moment. I have always loved dogs. Even when I was in college in Lucknow I adopted a pack of dogs and fed them and took care of them.
    4. I am totally indifferent to cats. I don’t hate or even dislike them. I just don’t care about them either way.
    5. I’m a composter. I use Eisenia foetida by choice but any earthworm species will do.
    6. As a kid I was phobic about insects, particularly large moths and beetles. That’s ironic because these days I’m a huge insect fan, particularly large moths and beetles.
    7. I am a biker. I ride a Royal Enfled Desert Storm but in general I prefer to walk when I can.
    8. I can speak three languages fluently, three languages less fluently, and I can understand a further three but not speak them.
    9. I could not speak a word of English till I was six. Today, I do all my writing and thinking in English.
    10. Talking about writing, I have two books published. However, I discovered that writing is the easy part. Finding a publisher is almost impossible. Also, the quality of writing has nothing to do with the ability to find a publisher.
    11. I have made up my mind that all my future writing will be available online only.
    12. I am partially deaf (this is a genetic problem) and I use contact lenses since I’m highly myopic.
    13. I am divorced. I knew the marriage would not work out before it happened but my ex-wife wanted to get married. So I allowed her to discover for herself that it would not work out.
    14. I am not a parent. At no time in my life have I ever had the slightest desire to be a parent. My girlfriend got pregnant once but miscarried. I was not unhappy.
    15. I am not bald. I shave my head since I find it less of a bother and I feel better this way.
    16. I can’t sing. I also can’t swim, play a musical instrument, or fly a kite.
    17. I have been bitten by humans, dogs, ants and mosquitoes; and stung by wasps and a bumble bee. I have never been stung by scorpions or bitten by leeches despite handling them many times.
    18. I have a dragon tattoo on each upper arm and another on my left upper back.
    19. I attempted suicide three times as a teenager in the course of five days. I ended up in a coma in hospital. If I ever attempt suicide again it will be in a way ensuring that there is no possibility of survival.
    20. I have been interviewed on TV. Twice.

    That's about it for now.

  7. Five Random things.

    1. I don't read blogs.
    2. I lied about the five thing.


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