Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Before Rose, There Was Foley

Let me tell you what I did tonight.

Yes, I know, be still your heart. Shut the hell up.
First I took one of those Zimbio quizzes. Because I'm a sheep. Don't judge. This one was "Which 80s Action Hero Are You?" Aw, yeah.

And guess what? I was Axel Foley!!!

So then I told Precocious Daughter, who is on Spring Break and has been binge-watching movies like some kind of, I don't know, adorable sloth who binge-watches movies, that she absolutely had to watch Beverly Hills Cop.

Yeah, OK, pretty much exactly like that.
So, bam, we watched Beverly Hills Cop. What did we even do before Netflix?

I know: We went to video stores.

Mmm. Smells like Giorgio perfume and suburbia.
Drunkards, in the mid-1980s I worked as a video store clerk. That's right, I had the coolest job of my generation, after MTV veejay and California Raisins animator.

It's the only time in my entire life that I've ever been the one with the cool job. And it was the best job I ever had, hands down. Better than warehouse supervisor, you say? Better than personal assistant to a motivational speaker? Better than office administrator for an office that didn't do anything?

Yes, yes, and hell yes.

To be fair, anything that happened in the 1980s is
automatically superior to anything that ever happened ever.

When I worked as a video store clerk, I watched approximately a shit-ton of movies. Hey, it was my job to be informed on new releases, classics, cult favorites, whatever came in the door. And when a popular movie was released on VHS (VHS, BABY!), it was my job to encourage customers to rent it.

And the best way to do that was to play it on the in-store TV during business hours.

A lot.

Artist's rendering.
And back in 1985 there was no bigger video release than Beverly Hills Cop. I mean, it was huge. And at the video store, we played it on the store TV almost on a continuous loop. Despite the fact that it was totally against company policy to play R-rated movies during business hours. Because it was the fucking 80s.

That's how we rolled, dudes.
I love this movie. I can literally quote the entire movie. I adore the uber-cheesy soundtrack. I love Lisa Eilbacher's poodle-perm and oversize blazers. And Bronson Pinchot as Serge OMG OMG.

Espresso with a little tweest of laymon
I probably watched Beverly Hills Cop 300 gabillion times in 1985-6. For me, it's one of the defining movies of the decade. (Yeah, whatever, Amadeus.) I hugely enjoyed watching it tonight. Not just because I freaking love this movie (did I mention that? I'm not sure), but because I love introducing PDaughter to music and movies and TV shows that made an impression on me. It brings us closer, it gives us shared memories, it renews in me the excitement of first discovering these things.

PDaughter enjoyed Beverly Hills Cop. I think she liked Billy Rosewood the best, and of course it's a very good sign to like Judge Reinhold. I think if the Senate asked more Cabinet nominees how they feel about Judge Reinhold in general and Billy Rosewood in particular, they might end up with more quality appointees. I'm just sayin.

And how, may I ask, did the honorable gentleman feel
about the "banana in the tailpipe" scene?
And now PDaughter is cleaning her room, and I'm writing this post, and I feel as if we've had a wonderful evening together, listening to Eddie Murphy curse his brains out. Life is good.


Oh, please, I took this child to see Dallas Buyers Club. If she were going to be permanently damaged by the f-word, believe me, it would have happened already.


I'm her mother. So the damage probably would have occurred around age five, and it's too late to do anything about it, is what I mean.

The Supercop story...was working.



  1. OMG I looooove "Amadeus"! I know it's not 100% factually correct, but Tom Hulce was brilliant! I'm glad PD like BHC- it really is a good movie. And I'm also glad I'm not the only one making my kid sit and watch movies that I loved when I was her age. Some she was really getting into. Some, however, miserably failed (I'm soooo sorry, "Young Sherlock Holmes").

  2. I remember that I watched it on college. I don't _think_ I remember anything much about it though. I remember most of the Eddie Murphy I've watched, so this for some reason just didn't make an impression on me. Wonder why.

  3. Fun (for a given value of "fun") fact: the first version of "I Heard It Through The Grapevine" that I ever heard was by the California Raisins.


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