|Not exactly an unfamiliar state of mind, though.|
That's right, I'm an aging GenX-er, and I still do dumbass millennial stuff like taking nude pictures on my cell phone. We are the world, kumbaya, circle of life, whatever.
But I digress.
Technically, he wasn't naked naked. Because of emoji pillows.
You've seen these, right? They sell them on Amazon, at Walgreens, at Walmart...I got mine at Michael's. Because I just thought they were crazy adorable.
|My decor is eclectic, all right?|
Precocious Daughter and I like our emoji pillows. They're a pop of color, a fun accent, a thing to throw at the Siamese kitten when she starts scratching at the balcony doors to go out and potentially leap four stories to her death.
|Also, like all the best interior decor, they will seem|
ludicrously anachronistic in later years.
In short, last night, after we spent a wonderful afternoon together, Drummer Boy inexplicably ended up naked in my living room. It's baffling. Total mystery to me. I don't know how these things happen.
I threatened to take an incriminating photo. He called my bluff. He was fine with it. But then I had an even better idea.
I decided to censor the image with my emoji pillows. Then I took the picture, with smiling yellow faces over his face and malehooditude.
It's freaking hilarious, you guys. I totally recommend you acquire emoji pillows for your next session of boudoir photography.
So what's the conundrum? Well, Drummer Boy loved the photo. In fact, he gave me explicit, written permission to publish it. In fact in fact, he encouraged me to feature it in a blog post. After all, it doesn't show any naughty bits. It doesn't show his face. And it's...yeah, it's freaking hilarious.
My baby is comfortable in his skin and has a warped sense of humor. He's pretty much perfect that way.
But I'm hesitant to show the world this amazing photo. As I said, it's not explicit and it's totally anonymous (I mean, except for those of you who happen to know Drummer Boy, in which case I must revert to the whole it's not explicit thing and also don't dare use your filthy imagination to fill in the details). Drummer Boy has no problem with me putting it up here.
I'm going to chalk it up to lingering traces of Catholic shame, combined with being raised in an era when sex education was taught mostly in abstruse code, lest anyone actually learn anything about sex. Oh, and let's throw in some decades-old body dysmorphia, because hey why not?
|The human body is strange and scary, amiright?|
My question is: Do you want to see it? Are you interested? It's PG-13 at worst, it's totes adorbs, it's funny as hell. I have permission to use it.
What do you think?
If enough of you weigh in yea or nay, I'll let you know the outcome. And I might post the photo if you guys tell me to go for it.
Here's your chance. Chime in, everybody.
Update: I just messaged Drummer Boy that I was going to run this post about the photo, and he replied (and I quote), "Go ahead, I told you to use it [smiley face emoji]."
So, yeah. I'm ready to go live with this if you guys say so.