Tuesday, June 14, 2016

I Drove an Hour to Do This

If you know me IRL, you know this. But for the rest of you (whom I love with all my heart)...

I got divorced today.

Me, I guess.
I didn't know I was getting divorced when I woke up this morning. I literally decided, as I opened my eyes, that I was going to drive 45 minutes to the county courthouse and have a judge sign my paperwork today.

Had I thought about it, planned it, scheduled it, I never would have done it. So when the thought popped into my head this morning, I went with it.

All the papers were properly filled out and signed by my ex and me. I knew that the district judges heard uncontested divorce cases from 8:00 to 9:00 a.m. each day. Literally all I had to do was make the drive and wait my turn.

It was hard, you guys.

To quote the Who, it's very, very, very, very hard.

A number of people were there with their lawyers. Some, like me, were alone. I wanted to hug them all. Because they all had the same look on their face: I can fucking do this. I totally related.

Four or five cases came up before mine. They were just people. People I can never in a million years judge, because my marriage ended up the same. One of the prior cases was a woman who actually got married a year before I did. That made me feel strangely better. I wasn't the only one who made it 25 years but couldn't make marriage work.

Not on topic. Yet on topic, you know?

It took just a few minutes for the judge to sign off on my divorce. She kind of scolded me, you guys, because I didn't request child support or a specific visitation schedule. I held my ground and said I was down with what I had (hadn't) requested. She flat-out told me that if it weren't for Precocious Daughter's age (16 1/2), she would not have approved my decree. And I get that. But I told her (honestly) that I wouldn't have been seeking a divorce if I couldn't support my child by myself, and she relented.

Just like Tina Turner, all I wanted was my name.
Anyway, afterward I told Precocious Daughter that it was done. I apologized for putting her through all this. And she replied, "You haven't put me through anything."

Goddamn, I love my kid.

Bottom line: Hey, Drunkards, I'm divorced. I can finally move on.

Thank you for your support. THANK YOU.

I guess this chapter is closed.

On to posts about Trump and squirrels and vodka and shit.

Maybe give me a day or two, though.

Because I just got divorced.

K thx.


  1. Sing a song of divorces
    A lifetime of high
    Five and twenty years after
    Spread your wings and fly.
    And when you see the earth below
    You may desire to sing
    Go ahead and do that, CB
    The future is on the wing.
    Your Drunkards are in your corner
    Sarky or blunt or funny
    The daughter is at your side
    And Drummer Boy your honey.
    The past is in the past now
    With the things it loathes
    Throw it in the dustbin
    Like a worn out set of clothes.

    So happy for you, C :)

  2. There's a pileup of songs in my head at the moment. I understand why The Who and Tina Turner are in there, and it sort of makes sense that Rush has popped up, and over all of it is a choir of children being joined by Mick Jagger in singing,

    You can't always get what you want
    But if you try sometime you find
    You get what you need.

    So I guess the lesson here is this rocks.

  3. Big hugs to you.


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