Thursday, September 10, 2015

Thoughts (Not Deep)

I started to write a post last night, but I got drunk and fell asleep.

That's probably a good thing. One of the sentences I wrote was "Pardon my French, but fuck me in the ass with a rusty beer can."

So there were overall tone issues with the post.

Instead of what I was going to write, here's a picture of a bathtub full of puppies.

That's much better.

Now, here are my thoughts of the day.

Beetlejuice should not have a sequel. Seriously. It's a perfect film. Leave it be.

Donald Trump is an idiot. Hardly an original thought, but it comes from the bottom of my heart.

I think that both the Bill Cosby and Caitlyn Jenner Halloween costumes are hilarious. If you're offended by social satire but are OK with 10-year-olds trick-or-treating as sexy witches, you need to abandon this holiday, please.

It's probably not emotionally healthy for me to be helping my almost-ex find an apartment. But I'm doing it. Because I do not know the meaning of the words "emotionally healthy."

Actually, "fuck me in the ass with a rusty beer can" is a pretty good oath.

Why do so many people hate snakes? Snakes are awesome.

I really need to make a doctor appointment so I can get back on my meds. I ran out a couple of weeks ago, and the crazy is barking to come in.

And on that note...let's all try to have a good day and not kill anyone, OK?


  1. "Fuck me in the ass with a rusty beer can" is an improvement over the line "Fuck me gently with a chainsaw" from Heathers, another Winona Ryder movie that hasn't been ruined by a sequel, but give it time. Maybe the planned Beetlejuice sequel will never happen, though. Hollywood can be crazy, and we can sometimes be grateful for that. A remake of Creature From The Black Lagoon hasn't happened in spite of being talked about for decades. With any luck it never will.

  2. Writing while drunk is always fun because I can come back the next day and be surprised by what I wrote. Same thing that would probably happen if I set up a camera and filmed a night of me walking around drunk.

    Snakes are awesome.

  3. Hey -- I come here for my Rick Perry news. Don't disappoint me now!!!


You're thinking it, you may as well type it. The only comments you'll regret are the ones you don't leave. Also, replies to threads make puppies grow big and strong.