Monday, December 1, 2014

Ode to Being Myself

I got a poem. Like it or not, here it is.

Today is Monday, December first,
And I've a special kind of thirst.
Thirteen weeks it's in the making,
Due to not a drink partaking.

I've avoided alcohol
For three months now, but fuck it all -
You can't refute my abstinence,
Though going on just makes no sense.

On August 31st I swore
I wasn't drinking any more.
My reasons, then and now, were solid;
But now my life seems sad and squalid.

You just don't understand the pain
That makes me want to drink again.
And so I'll try to make my case
For drinking and thus save my face.

Three months ago, I thought I would 
By now be single, happy, good.
Instead I'm stuck just where I was -
The only reason is "because."

Well wait, there is one other thing -
I'm far too scared to be leaving.
That makes me feel immensely weak.
And that is why relief I seek.

Oh, have I mentioned that I work?
And that I'm working for a jerk?
My so-called boss thinks that I'm crazy,
Also stupid, also lazy.

I don't think I have a choice
To make him think I have a voice.
I'd rather write this blog all day,
Except this fucking blog won't pay.

And so perhaps you'll kindly see
Why I've eschewed sobriety.
For thirteen weeks now I've been sober
But now those thirteen weeks are over.

I've had some shots, I'll have some more:
Fall off the wagon, drinks galore!
There will be those who disapprove;
Don't stay here, you; you gotta move.

So take or leave me, I must say.
I must be me, at end of day.
If I were stronger, I'd be lucid.
If I were sober, I'd feel stupid.

2 comments:

  1. This was an incredibly eloquent version of what I've heard too many bartenders say: "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here."

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, when you fall, we'll catch you :)

    ReplyDelete

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