I'm Failing November

When did November turn into such a bitch?

Yeah, I said it.

November is supposed to be a cool month. Cool temperatures, cool new sweaters and boots, and a big fat old turkey dinner on the fourth Thursday.

I used to look forward to November. But now it's just 30 days of stressing over things the Internet tells me I'm supposed to be doing. But of course I'm not.

I haven't grown a mustache.

I haven't stopped shaving.

I haven't posted something I'm thankful for every damn day on Facebook. (Can I just be thankful that I don't have to post something I'm thankful for 30 times?)

I haven't blogged every day.

I haven't written 21/30 of a novel.

I didn't remember the transgender people yesterday.

I didn't stop smoking today. I mean, I didn't smoke at all today, but I was supposed to stop, and I didn't.

I didn't get pneumonia. I'm not sure that's the purpose of World Pneumonia Day, but still.

OMG, I didn't celebrate Pirates Week!

My apologies to Willie Stargell.

Today was World Television Day, and I haven't watched any television. Or even listened to a single song by Tom Verlaine.

And on the 15th of this month, I utterly failed to commemorate the Day of the German-Speaking Community of Belgium. It's a thing, really, and I simply blew it off. Because I a dirty rotten November-failer.

The month is not a complete loss. I actually voted on Election Day. And on Sunday I will totally celebrate Precocious Daughter Turns 14 Day. Of course, I will pig out like a...um...pig on Thanksgiving.

I just feel as if I could have done so much more.

There's always next year.

Wait! Wait! Apparently November 21 is also World Hello Day!

HELLO!

Nailed it.