The red ones do the most damage. And camouflage the blood most effectively. |
So let's pick up where we left off, shall we?
Rule #32: Employees who are reassigned to a different department may require more orientation than being told repeatedly what a bunch of losers their former co-workers are.
Rule #33: Lacking a policy to deal with an issue is not an excuse for not dealing with the issue, especially if the issue involves taking six weeks to authorize a 30-minute service call.
Rule #34: If employees are expected to make hotel reservations for executives using their personal credit cards, and then don't receive reimbursements in a timely fashion, they may make the executives' next reservation at the Wastewater Treatment Plant Inn.
Rule #35: Technology upgrades should, whenever possible, actually result in the technology working better than before.
Rule #36: The person who insists on making an exception to the rule is probably the reason the rule was instituted in the first place.
Rule #37: When a procedure has to be explained to staff more than three times, it's not necessarily the staff that is stupid.
Rule #38: "Agreeing to disagree" typically means the same as "agreeing to do nothing."
Rule #39: Everyone expects the HR department to employ certain euphemisms when an employee leaves the company abruptly. There is a qualitative difference, however, between "Johnson will be pursuing other opportunities" and "Anyone asking questions about Johnson will be following him out the door."
Rule #40: A company's training methods are best modeled on something other than the children's game "Telephone."
Rule #41: Under certain circumstances, sharing one set of trade-show materials between offices can be a cost-saver. Those circumstances may not include spending $100 to ship a $200 item three times.
Rule #42: The difference between hanging a "WET PAINT" sign and labeling a file "OLD - DO NOT USE" is that eventually the paint will dry all by itself.
OK, 42 is always a good place to stop. I hope these rules have been helpful in a completely hypothetical and non-specific way. And remember, it takes two people to come up with a really bad idea: One to think of it and one to say nothing and keep a straight face until the meeting is over. See you next time on "Shit My Job Says"!
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