|Way looking forward to that.|
The amazing Hawk, loyal Drunkard, talented artist, creator of my amazing Facebook cover page, and super-mega-ultra-Dad, gave me a wonderful alternative to watching strangers judge my stuff and offer me pittances for it.
This weekend the local Boy Scouts...uh, council? pack? troupe?...are having their community garage sale. And Hawk - who has, get this, four sons who have all been Scouts - has volunteered to pick up anything and everything I might want to get rid of and contribute it to the sale.
|See also: W00t.|
|I'll be in my blanket fort if you need me.|
How about a list? Lists are fun.
This one is called "Top 10 Things the New Hamburglar Makes Me Feel."
Have you seen the new Hamburglar?
|Robble fucking robble.|
|Next up: The new Grimace.|
1. Fedora is on point.
2. Horizontal stripes...such couture cred.
3. Um. McStubble.
4. Can I wear your mask?
5. Red pleather gloves leave no tell-tale fingerprints on anything.
6. That is one goddamn lucky hamburger you're holding.
7. Your tie is cheeseburger-patterned. I want to nibble them all.
8. What did you do to make your coat so wrinkly, baby?
9. Imma wipe that smirk off your face with a flimsy paper napkin.
10. I do believe you just deep-fried my cherry pie.
All that and a sesame-seed bun.
Well, that was a lot more fun than obsessing over a freaking garage sale.