Saturday, March 17, 2012

I Am in No Way, Shape, or Form Irish

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Just for you, this image of a drunk leprechaun puking Lucky Charms.
Beloved Spouse's mom is 100% Irish, which means that BelSpouse is fully half Irish. It also means that Precocious Daughter is a solid one-quarter Irish.

I on the other hand have not a drop of green blood in me.

Fact: This image proves you can find a picture of
anything on the Internet.
I am of German descent. German and a smidge of Polish on my daddy's side, German and a smidge of English on my mom's side. I am so damn German I regulary have to fight off the urge to annex the Sudetenland.

A region of ethnic German majority in the former Czechoslovakia, ceded to Nazi Germany in 1938
and a precursor to Hitler's invasion of the country in 1939, which led to the start of World War II.
Hmmm, so my reference is probably in poor taste. I blame Monty Python.
Anyway, I have no ethnic basis for celebrating St. Patrick's Day. Although the Germans and the Irish do share a cultural heritage of eating lots of damn potatoes.
Caption: Lots of damn potatoes.
And let's not forget the ultimate melding of German and Irish sensibilities: the Reuben sandwich.

Corned beef and sauerkraut, baby. Add in the Swiss cheese and the Russian dressing,
and you've got the United Nations on rye.
Of course, sauerkraut is an abomination upon the Earth and I will not eat it. In fact, since I love me some tasty, lean corned beef, I'm kind of pissed at sauerkraut for ruining the Reuben for me. Couldn't the Germans have found something else to do with their cabbage...like destroying the cabbage farms and then salting the earth where they once stood?

I mean, coleslaw? Who thought this shit was a good idea?

The point is, don't kiss me, I'm not Irish. I guess. I'm not sure I have a point here. Oh, I do love Bailey's Irish Cream. And Bono. And that song about the unicorns. So, for no good reason, let's all celebrate the Irish today.


And now if you'll excuse me, I've hidden all the green clothes in my house, so I've got some pinching to do.

***

Note: After being told by several Drunkards that they HATE and LOATHE my Video Saturday posts, I'm discontinuing them. So no more videos on Saturday. Nope.



Kiss.

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