|Which I guess makes the black plague a social disease.|
|Hi, neighbor! Borrow a cup of feces?|
|What, this thing? Pshaw, you'll get used to it. |
And its clammy supple embrace around your neck late at night.
|Only uglier and approximately three feet long.|
Whereas PDaughter visualizes something more like this:
|It's adorable until he gnaws the head off that teddy bear.|
From the Latin for "serve with vegetables."
Something like "gutterbunnies." Or "scuttlepuppies." Or "Manhattan retrievers."
|Or rodenticus Jethrotullicus.|
They don't teach you how to handle this stuff in parenting classes.
|OK, I've got diapering down. |
Now what do I do about dead rats in the kid's bedroom?
|According to noted animal behaviorist Edward Vedder.|
So this decision may take quite a while to make, is what I'm saying.