Friday, November 14, 2014

Every Job Should Have Its Unique Perks, Am I Right?

When I say I'm killing this mom thing, I suppose your interpretation depends on what you personally mean by, and think of, the term "killing."

Because it can be good or bad, I guess?
For example, I made a comment on a friend's Facebook page earlier today. I've known this woman for a number of years; her son and my Precocious Daughter have been good pals since they were in kindergarten. Which absolutely was, like, a year ago and not almost a decade because that's just crazy talk.

Anyway, she's a very sweet, soft-spoken person who happens to have a solid iron core. She's raising three smart, creative, strong-willed kids, and she takes no guff from them. In her shoes I'd probably be catatonic. She also teaches at an "alternative" high school for kids with "challenges," and if I had to do battle in that environment every day, I'd likely also be "in jail."

This turns out to be a versatile photo.
She posted this on Facebook:

Just another day at the office.

And there were a lot of comments from other parents, who were predictably dismayed, as well as concerned for her safety and the general state of society.

And then there was me.

And also, sure, yeah, drugs are bad, mmkay?
I wasn't trying to be Smartass Mom or Druggy Mom or Make Light of Serious Issues Mom. That's just me; I'd have to try not to be those things. Honestly, that was my first reaction. Just like when I used to stay after school and find someone's really cool pencil or novelty eraser on the classroom floor: That bad boy is mine.

Maggie Smith/
Am I the only person who loved these things?
And if someone is going to stash their weed in my domain and then leave it behind? I mean, it's not as if they're going to come back later and say, "Um, I lost something in here." Far from being a sad commentary on the proclivities of today's youth, I see the entire situation as an excellent lesson in capitalism. Or something.

Anyway, you'll notice my comment got two "likes." One of them was from my friend. Because she's pretty kick-ass. And she says she turned the drugs in to the administration, but I'm thinking there's got to be something that helps her keep that sweet, calm demeanor all the time.

Also, she's probably just glad my kid hasn't shown up in her class yet.


  1. My grandmother lived in Jamaica and upon her return, Dad was helping her unpack, and found in her tea canister a stash of weed. Her housekeeper had been making it as a tea to relax my grandmother. When Dad told her what it really was, she was appalled. She told him to get rid of it. I asked how he got rid of it, and he replied, "A series of small fires".

    I'm with you. Finders keepers.

  2. Hahaha! What a coincidence that I accidentally stumble upon your post today of all days! Have you ever written about me before?
    Thanks for the flattering comments, but I really did turn it in to the office. But did you know that weed smells different now than it did when we were in school? Instead of smelling sweet, it now smells just like a skunk. So if you catch a whiff of a skunky smell nowadays, it might not really be from a skunk!
    My own drug of choice happens to be chocolate. Unfortunately, no student has ever stashed a bag of Reese's PB cups in my room. Maybe if we had chocolate-sniffing dogs?

  3. "I was at a PTA meeting and all the parents were talking about how to raise money. I said, 'we could sell crack!' And everyone looked at me like I was crazy, so I added, 'not to our own kids, of course!'"

    -Bobcat Goldthwait

    That story made me seriously think about having kids just so I could go to PTA meetings and say that.


You're thinking it, you may as well type it. The only comments you'll regret are the ones you don't leave. Also, replies to threads make puppies grow big and strong.