Saturday, November 9, 2013

Tabitha Takes on Other Moms

Note: My page admin Tabitha wants to write another post. And since she gave me an Indian rope burn (ow!), I decided OK. Disclaimer: I'm not responsible for what she writes, OK? OK.

hi. tabitha roxanne renee louise brown here. the chuckster has given me free rein to post again. i think she's watching old movies and crying. whatever. welcome to my blog.

your guest blogger. hi.
so earlier this week, chuck got an email that accused her of being a bad mother. or something.

Stop making me look bad, you spawn.
a fellow mom from her precocious daughter's class emailed everyone on the fucking planet to let them know that a) there were two rookie teachers in the districts's gifted program and b) they weren't ABSOLUTELY PERFECT GIFTS TO EDUCATING OUR PRECIOUS BABIES OMG OMG OMG.

I pay taxes so I that I don't have to think about my children,
and someone is violating that sacred trust. DIE.
i guess chuck is a really nice person and/or a total wimp (i favor the second theory duh). because the biological mothering unit who emailed the fucking planet said this (possibly i am paraphrasing, but so what i don't have kids):

"my precious darling child isn't being crushed under the weight of unrealistic academic expectations, which of course makes me think someone's head should be severed and placed on a platter because i'm only paying taxes so that my priceless children can be made miserable in preparation for ruling the world in the future; therefore, i demand that my diamond-encrusted baby's peers also be forced to submit to preposterous demands set by uncaring tyrannical teachers with no goal other than cowtowing to ridiculous parents who browbeat normal parents to believe that they're no fucking good unless they're forcing their will on public servants who thought they were trying to prepare the next generation for happy, productive lives but actually are only supposed to be unthinking automatons who urge children to be brainless conservative one-percenters just like their loser parents."

that's what i got from the email anyway.

now, chuck made me slightly proud by responding with a non-confrontational message that said, in part:

"I've just written personal emails to Ms. X and Ms. Y without cc'ing half the school district. I thanked them for their service and encouraged them to let me know if they had any concerns and promised that I would do the same. I've also spoken to PDaughter, who recognized the issues BitchParent raised but gave me no indication that her education is suffering from being exposed to two unseasoned teachers this year. If I get the sense that the [advanced] program is having problems, I'll be the first to offer support and encouragement to change. But I won't complain to the administration unless I see a specific red flag. I think PDaughter is getting an outstanding education. Of course, any parent who has a different opinion should definitely address it on an individual basis."

i, however, would have added:

i love how some parents have nothing better to do than complain about hard-working educators. before i say another word, i would suggest: get a fucking hobby. really, you have the nerve to criticize how taxpayer-funded teachers are doing their jobs based on nothing but hearsay that maybe, just maybe, they're not the best teachers ever ever ever? i had so many fucking mediocre teachers in my day; they made me appreciate the exceptional educators i did have, and taught me that my education was mostly dependent upon me seeking out the knowledge i wanted to acquire. my mom never wasted her time complaining that her precious spawn was somehow being slighted by a cruel universe, and i turned out fine. you're a sad person and i pity you. enjoy your goddamn pampered chef parties; some of us have more to worry about than whether life is handing us everything we thinking we fucking deserve.

chuck would never say these things, for some reason. so i am because i don't have kids and don't give a shit what other parents think.

i hope she appreciates my forthrightness.

i'm going to drink vodka and watch sports now. i have no desire to do whatever it is that suburban moms do on a saturday night. also, i may get laid later. how about you?


  1. Vodka and sports. I am with you. I am the other kind of parent. Whose kids are at the top of the class and think nothing at all should be done to "scaffold and support their giftedness." I am an excellent test taker. Never been below the 99th percentile and am unemployed and fat now. I'm not saying education is useless...but crushing education is useless. Keep drinking. (Which by the way is what other suburban moms do on saturday- at least in my suburb.)

  2. Some people aren't happy unless they are bitching about SOMETHING. These people will never die off..they'll just keep producing more little miserable gits... sigh..


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