Wednesday, May 16, 2012

The Prosecution Calls Miss Diana Ross

Check this out, from Yahoo! News:
The defense in the John Edwards corruption trial rested on Wednesday morning in Greensboro, N.C., without calling the former presidential candidate, his daughter Cate or Rielle Hunter, his former mistress, mother of his 4-year-old love child and the woman at the center of the scandal that spawned the federal case against him.
Wait, what?

"Love child"?

Do we still use that term in the year of our Lord 2012?

OMG, apparently we still do.
At least these media outlets aren't calling Sen. Edwards' daughter a "bastard," "illegitimate child," or "sinful spawn of Satan's naughty bits." Although perhaps these alternate definitions are incorporated by reference.

Whatever, it's all the kid's fault.
 I'm reminded, of course, of the classic 1968 hit song by Diana Ross and the Supremes, "Love Child."

Back then, there was still great shame in having a child out of wedlock, and even in being such a child. Fortunately, society's attitudes have changed significantly toward this issue, thanks in part to noble horndogs like John Edwards. His federal corruption trial has brought to light the tragedy of children born "in an old, cold, rundown tenement slum."

Poor Frances Quinn Hunter is forced to call this dump home.
Left to fend for themselves, with nothing but $9,000 a month in diverted campaign funds, Sen. Edwards' love child and her poverty-stricken mother have lived in the shadows on the fringes of society.

Except for the odd National Enquirer spread.
It's a life without glamor or abundance.
And the occasional pantsless GQ photo shoot.
Poor little Frances. As if it's not bad enough to be called out as a "love child," now her daddy might be heading to prison. Sad, but not unexpected in the lives of these outcast children.

I just have to wonder: If the baby Sen. Edwards had with his mistress while his wife was dying of cancer is a "love child," what would you call those other kids he had?

I nominate "loinburgers."
Thank you, Yahoo! News, for giving me such insight into this tragic story. And thank you, Miss Ross, for setting it to a slinky groove. I like my antiquated moralizing rhetoric to have a good beat.

1 comment:

  1. Yeah, I never understood the term "love child"... especially when the child was the result of an affair which I would guarantee involved no actual feelings of love; lust maybe, but love is doubtful...


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