Monday, February 20, 2012

Chuck Baudelaire's Day Off

I have the day off today. My company gives its employees Presidents' Day as a paid holiday. That shit is insane. My entire working life I've never had Presidents' Day off.

Is it just me, or was GW kind of hot?
OK, maybe just me.
But wait, there's more. I get Good Friday off, too.

It's the holiday Christians and Jews can both enjoy.
Too soon?
And if that weren't completely freaking nuts, I get to take my birthday as a paid holiday.

Holy crap, my company is pretty awesome. I mean, I already knew that, in that they pay me to do virtually nothing. I mean, they don't know they do that. But they do. And it's pretty awesome. The fact that I get all these cool holidays, where they pay me to not even pretend to show up and work, is just icing on the cake. 
Pink, fluffy, sweet icing. Mmmmmmm.
Or, you know, chocolate would be good, too.
And here's the thing (this just keeps getting better and better): Beloved Spouse has to work today. And Precocious Daughter has school. Their respective schools don't recognize Presidents' day as an opportunity to goof off. So this holiday is mine ALL MINE. If you don't understand the unimaginable luxury a solo day off represents, then you are not a wife and/or mother.

No, dude. Really. No.
 So I'm posting earlier than usual today, because it's MY DAY OFF. What am I going to do? I don't know, drive my friend's dad's sports car, sing "Danke Schoen" in a parade, go to a Cubs game...the possibilities are endless.

I will not, however, be rocking this look.
No offense, Ferris.
I may do very little, or an awful lot, or somewhere in between. But I'm going to have a damn good time thanks to our Founding Fathers and my company's HR department. God Bless America and federal funding.

Catch you later, dudes.




You're still here? The post is over.
Go home.

No comments:

Post a Comment

You're thinking it, you may as well type it. The only comments you'll regret are the ones you don't leave. Also, replies to threads make puppies grow big and strong.