Today's post is brought to you by Day 12 of the "30 Days Without a Drop" project. And the letter F.
The Seven Stages of Not Drinking
Stage 1: Holy crap, I don't ever want to wake up feeling like this again.
Stage 2: Nothing for me tonight. What am I, some kind of freaking alcoholic?
Stage 3: Boy, do I feel better when I'm not drinking. I should not drink more often. (Also, I should not drink more often...get it?)
Stage 4: See, I do just fine without alcohol. Who needs it?
Stage 5: This was the kind of day where ordinarily I would have a drink in my hand by now. But I don't need liquor to cope. I'm better off without it.
Stage 6a: Although I feel great right now, it's probably a good thing I drank the house dry before I gave it up. No sense in leaving temptation lying around.
Stage 6b: I wonder how many days it's been... (counts) That many, huh?
Stage 6c: I'm really thirsty.
Stage 6d: You know what would be really great right now? Settling in with a good movie and a drink. Oh, wait...
Stage 6e: I don't want to watch a movie.
Stage 6f: I'm doing really well with this not drinking thing. But it's not as if I have to prove anything to anyone.
Stage 6g: God, I'm thirsty.
Stage 6h: I mean, I don't have to prove SHIT to ANYONE. Am I right??
Stage 6i: A person with, you know, a real problem would never be able to stop drinking this long. So there's that.
Stage 6j: No one is FORCING me not to drink, you know. I mean, it's not some iron-clad RULE or anything. This is just me and my goddamn willpower, OK?
Stage 6k: I should probably pick up a bottle. Just to have it in the house. Not that I'm going to have a drink or anything. But sometime in the future, after I've cleared out my system, I might
Stage 6l: If I had some alcohol right now, I would definitely be knocking it back. It's a damn good thing I don't.
Stage 6m: It doesn't MATTER how many days it's been. It could not possibly matter LESS how many days it's been. I'm not living my life based on some stupid number. Pffft.
Stage 6n: Because I have shown a good effort, godammit! I have accomplished a goal! I'd like to see some miserable tosspot drunk show this kind of effort, you know? Because they couldn't do it, but I could! I mean, I did! I mean, I am! Shut up!
Stage 6o: I could totally have a drink right now if I wanted to.
Stage 6p: I should have a drink, just to show how well I can handle it.
Stage 6q: It's not as if I EVER said I was giving up drinking for good.
Stage 6r: I should totally have a drink.
Stage 6s: I deserve a drink.
Stage 6t: There is absolutely nothing to be gained by not having a drink. The presumptions behind moral constructivism are illusory at best.
Stage 6u: Where the fuck did THAT come from? I am SOBER, man.
Stage 6v: OK, life, you win. I'm weak. I have cravings. Are you happy now?
Stage 6w: See, I went another day without drinking. I can do this!
Stage 6x: See, I went another day without drinking. How much longer do I have to do this?
Stage 6y: In the larger cosmic sense, it makes no difference whether I have a drink or not. I am but a speck on a mote on a flea.
Stage 6z: I'm so tired of even having to think about this shit any more.
Stage 7: It's all good. I can stop drinking whenever I want.
Repeat.
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