Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Tune In, You Guys

The President of the United States wants to defund public television.


Yes, the Public Broadcasting Service, or PBS.

Non-American readers: If you want to understand the impact of this proposed defunding, please learn about PBS here. Actually, it's a good read for Americans, too, who might otherwise take the existence and ubiquity of public television for granted.

In a nutshell, if you live in the USA and have enjoyed any of these, it's because of PBS:

Muppets
Mister Rogers
Julia Child
The Electric Company
Bob Vila
Bob Ross (BOB F'ING ROSS, PEOPLE)
Monty Python
Fawlty Towers
Carl Sagan
Are You Being Served?
The PBS Newshour fka the McNeil/Lehrer Report
Sneak Previews with Siskel and Ebert
Austin City Limits (!!!)
Doctor Who
Clifford the Big Red Dog
Dragon Tales
Downton Abbey
Cosmos (COOOOOSSSSMMMOOOOSSSS)

But screw all that, because our current President wants to save approximately 0.05% of the total budget by slashing funding to PBS.

And we could totally appropriate that money for a gold-plated buttplug engraved with his initials, yo.

I DO NOT ENDORSE THIS AWESOME IMAGE, OK?

I'm so disheartened that this move is not motivated by a need to save money, but clearly by a need to destroy institutions that might with impunity question the right of our current Commander in Chief to do whatever the hell he wants at the expense of small, ineffective  players like, oh, the American People.

It's almost as if Trump promised - and is now fulfilling that promise - to be the President of the money-grubbing assholes who don't care about anything but their own wealth fuck yeah.

Because why else kill the network of Masterpiece Fucking Theater?

Yeah, I thought so.

My eyes are on 2018, Drunkards, when we can at least begin to take back America from the would-be fascist Scrooges of this country.

#Resist

Kill Masterpiece fucking Theater, my ass.

God Bless America.

Monday, February 20, 2017

Valentine's Day, Our Way

So, the last week was dominated by the illness and ultimate loss of my Darling Dog.

Many thanks to those who have offered words to support, sympathy, and love. It helps. A lot.

But amid the emotional tumult of DDog's passing, Valentine's Day happened last week, too. Now, neither Drummer Boy nor I are romantic people in the sense of grand gestures and lavish gifts. The most precious thing we can spend on each other is time, because we just don't get very much together. We work full-time on different schedules, I've got a Precocious Daughter to wrangle, he's got his music...and when I can manage it, I have my writing. For the most part, we have one weekday lunch and one Sunday afternoon/evening together per week. That's it. The rest of the time it's sending each other goofy emojis on Facebook Chat and waiting for our next window of togetherness.

I'm particularly fond of Snoopy stickers.

And Sinister Oyster.
Because I'm abnormal.
Anyway, I was not expecting to see Drummer Boy on Valentine's Day. It fell on a Tuesday, which is not typically a day he's available for lunch. And since he frequently works evenings, I assumed last Tuesday would be one of them.

But it wasn't.

You guys, I got to see Drummer Boy on Valentine's Day. We spent the evening together, mostly watching TV and helping PDaughter with her homework. Romantic AF, right?

Remember, I find this adorable.

But it was wonderful. He didn't get me candy (which I don't eat) or flowers (which...well, I love flowers but I wasn't expecting them). I didn't get him anything. But we had time, which was the bestest thing of all.

Oh, he didn't come entirely empty-handed. He brought me this.



This is a 1/32 scale die cast model of a New Beetle. Not a New New Beetle, which is available now, but a New Beetle, which is what I drove for almost 10 years.

Is it painted with roses and sunflowers? Why yes, it is.

My Bug, Tic Tac, had a sunroof. But then you couldn't see
the pretty roses on the roof.

And it has something Tic Tic didn't have: Pretty happy eyes.

My Bug had blank starey eyes that cost fifty bucks a pop
to replace when they burned out.
Guys, in addition to being the sweetest gift ever, this little model Bug is remarkably detailed. I'm impressed by the accuracy.


I'm going to go into New Beetle Geek Mode for a bit. First, this is a post-2002 model New Beetle. You can tell by the headrests. My 2002 Bug, a limited-edition model in Luna Green, was the first to feature solid headrests rather than "donut-style" ones. You can also tell because the tail lights are horizontally divided, rather than the "eyeball" style that came in around 2006.

I said geek, I meant geek.

Also, it has a realistic dashboard, true-to-life door panels, and even the ever-annoying cupholders that didn't hold anything larger than a 12 oz. can of soda.

From parking brake to hubcaps, this is an accurate tiny version of the Bug I love and remember.

But this isn't about arcane Bug-geek trivia.

It's about the fact that Drummer Boy didn't get me flowers, candy, or jewelry for Valentine's Day. Instead he got me something he knew I would love and appreciate.

It wasn't expensive. I can't wear it on my wrist or finger or earlobes. And probably a majority of people - men and women - don't consider a model Volkswagen Beetle a particularly romantic gift.

Except it is. It's the most thoughtful, loving gift my Drummer Boy could have given me. Because it shows he knows me and understands me. And that means more than any stupid expensive gift.

I love you, Drummer Boy.